Using the HABIT Framework for Self-Care

You’ve heard from my amazing co-authors of The Glambitious Guide to Self-Love, Peace and Confidence about what self-love is, and why it is so important. Now, I want to share with you how to actualize it. How to bring self-love into action.

Like so many of my coaching clients, I know that many of you are exhausted by the uncertainty and upheaval and the changes that the COVID-19 pandemic has brought to your personal and professional lives. To your families, your home – and if you are a parent, you’re grappling with switching from online to in-person classrooms.

No matter how…we’ve all been challenged. Physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally. Every day, in some way, over the past 2 years.

So, it’s not surprising that so many of us are experiencing stress, burnout and overwhelm.

Which is why it’s important to not just talk about self-love, but to practice it. To bring action to it.

Self-love is about appreciating yourself. It grows from actions that support your physical, psychological and spiritual growth. Now, I’m going to offer some tips to operationalize self-love through self-care.

Self-care is about acknowledging that no one is going to take care of you, like you will take care of yourself. It's about acknowledging that you're 100% responsible for your physical, spiritual, and emotional wellness, health and overall well-being.

As I mentioned, I’m a public health expert, professor, ICF certified empowerment coach, and a belonging strategist. People always ask me, “Montrece, what does it mean to be a belonging strategist?"

Well, when I work with organizations and leaders, my goal is to help them build truly inclusive shared spaces where human potential can be unleashed.

When I work with my coaching clients, my goal is to remind them that anywhere they are called or aspire to be, they belong. I work with them to design plans and help them take inspired action to get there.

One of the definitions of “belonging” is to be in the right and suitable place. It’s a psychological safety that allows you to show up in an authentic way. It allows you to be confident that you’ll be accepted and valued for your individual strengths, traits and lived experiences.

Belonging is a basic human need, and something we must create for ourselves. And it all starts with self awareness. You’ve got to really know yourself.

• Take time to spend time on your own.
• Explore what you like and what you don't like.
• Explore your hopes, dreams and desires.
• Uncover your biases.
• Start giving.

You know what feels good for you and what doesn't. For your mind, body and soul.

True and deeply nourishing self-care, helps you know yourself, hear yourself, understand yourself and come home to yourself.

It’s about providing adequate attention to one's physical and psychological health, and well-being. Self-care is about engaging in activities and behaviors that nourish us.

So, yes, manicures and facials count! But it’s SOOO much more than that. It’s about taking an active role to preserve, protect, or improve one's whole selves. To care for our mental, physical, and spiritual health and well-being.

In today’s day and age, self-care itself is an act of resilience. 

You know the saying, “You can't pour from an empty cup”? I challenge you to take this cliche and make it a practice. A way of being. A habit.

The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your habits. If you want to make yourself a priority, if you truly want to show yourself love, improve your confidence, and anchor your peace— then make self-care a habit.

In my chapter of The Glambitious Guide to Self-Love, Peace and Confidence, I offer you a five-step framework using the acronym HABIT to do just that.

It is about focusing on your health, awareness, belonging, intellectual self-care, and taking inspired self-care action.

Health

Health is focused on your physical and physiological well-being. Getting enough sleep, and enough exercise or movement that feels right to you. Making sure you're eating properly, and you're following up on those medical appointments. It’s also about your sexual health.

Awareness

Awareness is about spiritual, mental, and emotional self-care. It’s about slowing down and reflecting.It’s about mindfulness and observing your thoughts and feelings. It’s about prayer or meditation, mental decompression and finding emotional balance.

Belonging

Belonging is about psychological well-being. Belonging and self-care go hand-in-hand because it’s about self-awareness and self-acceptance. But, it’s also about developing a support system of human connection, so you have human connection when you need it.

It's about developing meaningful relationships and cultivating cultures of belonging. Relationships help us develop a sense of belonging in ourselves, and an acceptance for ourselves.

Intellectual Self-Care

Intellectual self-care includes doing things that keep your mind sharp. It’s about using creative outlets, hobbies, puzzles or even learning about a subject that fascinates you.

Taking Inspired Action

Self-care is a highly individual practice. I’m offering a framework, but there's no set prescription for how or when to do it. It’s any deliberate activity that we take part in, or take action on, that improves our physical, mental and spiritual well-being and health.

Self-care is about knowing what you need to feel nourished and cared for in the tiny moments throughout your day. It’s about intending to come back to yourself, with a goal of remembering that you belong. In this world, and anywhere you are called or aspire to be.

But you first, belong to yourself.